AJ and a LATTE

I thought when I retired my life would slow down a little!  No longer would I have the “Sunday Scaries” trying to get lesson plans done and the long list of to do’s ready for the new week.  No longer would I have to come home and lament over the times I had to be the bad guy or the lessons that took a left turn and have to be redesigned before tomorrow.  Now that I have almost completed a semester, I am realizing that I haven’t adjusted like I thought I would.

I am still working basically 8-5.  Yes, the school day ended at 3:45, but I never left before 5:00.  So really, that has stayed basically the same.  I have a little more freedom to stretch my 8:15 arrival time or I can leave a little early if I need to without getting a cover, but basically the time is the same.  One of the differences, however, is lunch!  Never did I dream this would be a stressor!  I have an hour for lunch.  I am too far to run home for lunch, and we all know the world has gotten SO expensive.  I take my lunch every day.  No big deal, right?  Well, I just jumped right back into the habit of having my lunch at my desk and working through the hour.  Guess what!   I’m not supposed to do that!  Having the kindest boss ever, he very gently told me the other day that he expects me to stop and take a break for at least 30 minutes…no need to work through my lunch at my desk. What? What in the world am I supposed to do???  I have followed this practice for so long that it is habit!  I had lunch with my “art-ner in crime” a lot, but my last year I worked through most of the time.  Now I have to kill an hour?!  

Another adjustment is no working from home.  I submitted a help ticket to find out what I needed to do in order to take my work home with me.  THEY SAID NO!  What???!!!!  No work from home?  What am I supposed to do? Wait until tomorrow to finish my tasks?  Do my work from 8:15 to 5:00 (with an hour lunch) then just go home???  

Now, I do still have my flute students.  That has been a constant.  A couple of evenings a week I still teach, but when I am done, I’m done!  I don’t have anything to worry about…so I worry about that!  

I have not made this transition nearly as smoothly as I thought I would.  Teaching is who I have always been.  It has been my complete identity.  Now, I don’t really know how to feel.  I love what I am doing (the bookkeeping part is a bit of a learning S-curve, but I’m getting there), but I’m not sure who I am anymore.  Today I taught my flute trio first period then ran through and spoke to my former admin.  It felt like a glove, a comfy pair of slippers, my skin…it was “normal.”  Then I went to work.  I have made my office really “me.”  I love my office.  I visited with my colleagues.  I took my lunch break and went to the chiropractor.  We had a gathering at the President of the university’s home and I visited with my new Wayland family.  I am happy.  I do love what I’m doing.  I am just still figuring out my new normal.  It feels like that has been the mantra of my life for the last several years…the new normal.  

God moved so boldly with opening doors that I KNOW I am where He wants me.  I have no reservation about that at all.  He lined everything up for me so clearly that there was no question what I should do.  Now my prayer is that He use me and help me really fit into the next chapter of my story. I am taking three decades of doing what I loved and using that experience to navigate a totally new course.  I’m ready to feel as comfortable in my Wayland skin as I was in my Roosevelt and Abernathy skin.  I know I’m where He wants me.  Now I am ready to brush the new off and be in my comfy niche.  I have been welcomed with open arms.  Now I’m ready to embrace it.  

My prayer for this new chapter is to continue to love what I do and embrace the differences.  It is okay to let go of the habits of my teaching career.  I will develop new habits.  Just because I move forward does not mean I lose who I am.  I am just building on what my God has created.  

With a beautiful Christmas season I celebrate my Savior’s birth with the birth of an openness to change.  I have made the physical transition, but here’s to the mental shift.  May my new course be filled with signs of His presence and His pleasure in my journey.  May I take the new habits and glorify Him in them.

Until next time…